It was a day of adventure, from Lod Cave to Pai Canyon! And after a body melting two hour coconut oil massage back in Pai, I decided to get some tea at the night market before walking home. As I walked I watched for any cravings I experienced as the aromatic smells of the food stalls wafted all around me. After one week of juice fasting, I’m impressed that I’m not feeling more tempted! I attempted to just enjoy witnessing the pleasure of others as they ate dumplings, grilled corn, and all sorts of fried and BBQd goodies. Humorously, I seem to be at ease in the extremes, but moderation remains so elusive! Step by step 🙂
I began to become increasingly more aware of my breathing and of my body as I moved. At the same time I decided try a little waking meditation. With each breathe I allowed the feeling of love to enter and leave my body, feeling it flow through me with each step. I became aware of a pleasant sensation, almost a subtle electrical buzz, move around my body as I did and I sent loving intentions to each being that I passed. Tourists, food stall owners, even dogs all received some of my love! My eyes met a few set of other eyes in a shared passing moment, a slight smile on the lips and in the corners of the eyes as if to say “I feel it too”.
As I walked through the town I noticed the small things that would take my attention off of this practice, sudden judgements or cravings or other distractions, and then kindly guided myself back to focus. As I crossed the east bridge out of town and walked towards the hills where I was staying, I wondered what it might be like to be able to live like this all the time. Is that even possible? What about when I have to make difficult decisions or have tough interactions? Could I still come from a place of this much love? I wondered if that might be how more deeply enlightened people felt, swimming in a sea of infinite love for all things, blissful in a state of non duality. I bet that is how the Dalai Lama feels? Imagine what it would be like to live for just a moment in his mind!
By this point I was well outside of town, walking on a dark street, lost in my own world of thoughts when a loud crash broke my attention. I looked 50ft ahead and saw that a motorcycle has just crashed ahead of me and a person was lying crumpled between a tree and a sign post… and I was the closest person to witness it! I ran over, joined by another motorbike rider and a couple of French girls who had not been far behind me and also run over to help. The injured rider, a Chinese man, was sprawled over his motorbike and groaning. I told them all that I’d get help and ran to a restaurant down the road to ask then to call an ambulance. When I came back to the scene, the man was sitting up, looking dazed with a bashed in jaw and missing a couple of teeth. There was blood on his shirt and his hands looked cut up but otherwise he didn’t look like he’d broken any bones amazingly! The French girls were tending to a few of his wounds with some bottled water and tissue paper that they’d had in their bag. I asked him his name and if he knew where he was. Luckily he did. Once we were sure he was going to be OK and that the other motorbike rider, who turned out to be his friend, could take care of him we went on our way. After saying goodbye to the French girls, and comforted by the sound of an approaching ambulance in the distance, I sent the man some healing intentions and continued my walk of loving meditation down the dark road, towards my bamboo bungalow in the woods.